Saturday, September 17, 2011

Sometimes I wonder...

I know that I can't be the only woman whose significant other is obsessed with that damn game Call of Duty Black Ops. That game is the one thing that really messes up our relationship. Every weekend he will play alllllllll freakin' night. I will fall asleep on the couch and be woken up to the sound of him chatting with his online friends about the number of kills he has. So I go to bed thinking he will follow me.


I wake up the next morning and he is either still playing or he has fallen asleep on the couch.

I know pregnancy hormones has made me crazy but it really infuriates me.

It makes me feel lonely.

It makes me cry.

He doesn't get it.

Seriously, we have a discussion/argument about this frickin' game at least once a week. He promises me the world and says he will stop playing so much and he will help me around the house more. I ultimately say ok. Things get better for about a week and then - POOF - he goes right back to his old behaviors. Sometimes I believe that he really could care less that my feelings are hurt because it seems he would rather play his game then spend time with me.

All I can think about is: "is this how it is going to be when Aubrey arrives?" Our relationship is about to change in a monumental way and I am afraid his priorities will no longer include me. I understand and accept and respect that our relationship is bound to take a back seat for the most part when our daughter is born - but what happens when we have that little smidge of time for us? He will ultimately choose the game, right? I sincerely hope not.

My eyes are tearing up as I write this, my heart feels smashed to billions of pieces when I think about this subject. My heart is broken. I am broken.

What in the world do I do?

I can't continue like this. In my mind my only option now is to leave him. We aren't married so it won't be messy. I don't even know if I want to marry him.

I keep thinking that it would be easier to leave before Aubrey arrives. Cut ties now and have a plan for when she is here.

What do I do?

No comments:

Post a Comment

Hi! Thanks for taking the time to show us some love. I really appreciate each and every comment and I will respond as soon as I can! Thanks!


Template by: Bright Sunshine Designs by Mary - Affordable Custom Blog Design © 2012

Design Elements by: Tracie Stroud